E039 – Pork Slap, Hippo Attack, Jerk Store, and Cat Lady


In Episode 39 of Florida Men: The Podcast, a Florida Man gets slapped in the face with some hard meat, a Florida Woman pisses off a hippopotamus, a Florida Man got really excited at Dollar General, and a Florida Woman is a crazy cat lady.

This week, we recorded extra content that can only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content!

News Sources:

Florida Woman arrested for throwing frozen pork chop at boyfriend
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/florida/pork-chop-battery-780129

Florida Woman attacked by an angry hippo during Zimbabwe vacation
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6653199/Florida-woman-37-speaks-attacked-angry-hippo-dream-Zimbabwe-vacation.html

Florida Man accused of openly masturbating in Dollar General
https://www.wftv.com/news/local/orange-county-corrections-officer-accused-of-openly-masturbating-in-dollar-general/911239873?fbclid=IwAR0VxfOwp3bt1JgXaeqdKN-YfnS7hbHNJVp0k79uMsH1M-0KDfTAVU4Kx-o

Florida Woman hides in cat cage after hitting dog walker with his own flashlight
https://www.wftv.com/news/local/florida-woman-hides-in-cat-cage-after-hitting-dog-walker-with-flashlight-police-say/912756289

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets (No Spoilers):
https://tinyurl.com/FLMenBrackets

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets (With Results):
https://tinyurl.com/FLMenBracketsResults


Listen to The Hidden Staircase on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get our show.

Continue reading E039 – Pork Slap, Hippo Attack, Jerk Store, and Cat Lady

E038 – Casey Anthony, William Shatner’s Love Child, a Waffle House Floozy, and a Pill Thief


In Episode 38 of Florida Men: The Podcast, Florida Woman Casey Anthony should just shut up already, a Florida Man should just give up already, a Florida Woman reminds Phil that Joel still owes him Waffle House, and a Florida Man steals the wrong pills.

This week, we recorded extra content that can only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content!

News Sources:

Florida Woman Casey Anthony reveals she’ll visit wife killer Scott Peterson to ‘help wrongfully convicted people’
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6616651/Casey-Anthony-visit-Scott-Peterson-help-wrongfully-convicted-people-cancels-reality-show.html

Florida Man, 62, claims he is William Shatner’s love child
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6624011/Florida-man-62-claims-William-Shatners-love-child-tries-actors-name.html

Florida Woman accused of dancing naked in Waffle House parking lot, licking employee
https://www.wtsp.com/article/news/weird/wtflorida/florida-woman-accused-of-dancing-naked-in-waffle-house-parking-lot-licking-employee/67-301bf130-1f06-49ad-86b8-19c797b5ee57

Florida Man steals the wrong prescription
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/funny/laxative-theft-mistake-164923

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets (No Spoilers):
https://tinyurl.com/FLMenBrackets

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets (With Results):
https://tinyurl.com/FLMenBracketsResults


Listen to Pretend Radio on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get our show.

Continue reading E038 – Casey Anthony, William Shatner’s Love Child, a Waffle House Floozy, and a Pill Thief

E037 – Machete, Rolex, Syringes, and Chill Pills


In Episode 37 of Florida Men: The Podcast, a Florida man tries to kill his neighbor with Kindness, a Florida woman plays hide and seek with stolen Rolexes, a Florida man plays hide and seek with 3 syringes, and a Florida woman has no chill.

This week, we recorded extra content that can only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content!

News Sources:

Florida Man Tries To Kill His Neighbor With Kindness, His Machete
https://www.miamiherald.com/news/state/florida/article224512290.html

Florida Woman Stashed Five Stolen Rolexes Inside Her Body
http://www.mysuncoast.com/2019/01/14/stolen-rolex-watches-found-during-strip-search-florida-woman/

Florida Man Says 3 Syringes Found In His Rectum Aren’t His, Claims To Not Know How They Got There
https://www.wfla.com/news/pinellas-county/clearwater-man-denies-3-syringes-found-in-his-rectum-are-his/1691775047

Florida woman pulls gun at salon after being told to take a ‘chill pill’
https://www.nbc-2.com/story/39789097/florida-woman-pulls-gun-told-to-take-chill-pill-in-cape-coral

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets (No Spoilers):
https://tinyurl.com/FLMenBrackets

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets (With Results):
https://tinyurl.com/FLMenBracketsResults

Continue reading E037 – Machete, Rolex, Syringes, and Chill Pills

E036 – Three Hungry Criminals and a Hide & Seek Loser


In Episode 36 of Florida Men: The Podcast, a Florida Man eats a cop’s car, a Florida Woman eats a cop’s dinner, another Florida Woman beats her parents because they won’t take her to dinner, and a Florida Man loses a game of hide & seek with deputies.

This week, we recorded extra content that can only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content!

News Sources:

Florida Man chews up police car after arrest
https://miami.cbslocal.com/2019/01/11/florida-man-chews-up-police-car-seat-cocaine-arrest/

Florida Woman Breaks Into Police Station, Eats Officer’s Food, Is Arrested After Leaving ID Behind
https://www.newsweek.com/florida-woman-breaks-police-station-eats-officers-chicken-and-asparagus-gets-1286157

Florida woman attacks parents after they refuse to take her to Outback
https://www.local10.com/news/florida/palm-beach-county/florida-woman-attacks-parents-after-they-refuse-to-take-her-to-outback

Florida Man arrested after failing to convince deputies he wasn’t home
https://www.firstcoastnews.com/article/news/fugitive-arrested-after-failing-at-tricking-flagler-deputies-he-isnt-home/77-331dc47e-b809-4a75-8829-440c62bd03b1

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets (No Spoilers):
https://tinyurl.com/FLMenBrackets

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets (With Results):
https://tinyurl.com/FLMenBracketsResults

Continue reading E036 – Three Hungry Criminals and a Hide & Seek Loser

E035 – Time Traveler, Tricycle Thief, Tricycling Thief, and a Vampire Hunter


In Episode 35 of Florida Men: The Podcast, a Florida Man falls victim to a malfunctioning flux capacitor, a Future Florida Woman steals a tricycle, a current Florida woman robs a mailman while riding a tricycle and a Florida Man tries to burn the vampires out of his house.

This week, we recorded extra content that can only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content!

News Sources:

Florida man crashes car into building during unsuccessful time travel attempt
https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/local/2015/12/24/time-traveling-florida-man-crashes-car-building/77897760/

Florida toddler steals a tricycle
https://www.local10.com/news/florida/miami-dade/3-year-old-seriously-hurt-after-crashing-motorcycle-into-fence-police-say

Florida Woman claims to be God, commits armed robbery, attempts escape on tricycle
https://www.naplesnews.com/story/news/crime/2018/12/23/woman-claims-god-robs-postal-truck-fake-pistol-deputies-say/2401858002/

Florida Man screamed about vampires before burning down his house
https://www.news-journalonline.com/news/20181224/police-man-screamed-about-vampires-before-burning-down-daytona-house

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets:
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1pf-MNs5sMZnWTUJqp4CVPTN81lA7UXl69fk6rFMGgAg/edit?usp=sharing

Axis of Awesome: Four Chord Song on YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOlDewpCfZQ

Continue reading E035 – Time Traveler, Tricycle Thief, Tricycling Thief, and a Vampire Hunter

E034 – Ice Cream Addict, Straw Man, Unlucky Mugger, and Bathroom Bangers


In Episode 34 of Florida Men: The Podcast, a McDonald’s customer pulls a gun in the drive-thru, a McDonald’s employee doesn’t pull any punches in the dining room, a Florida mugger picks the worst possible victim, and a Florida woman cock-blocks her brother.

This week, we recorded extra content that can only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content!

News Sources:

Florida Man pulls gun at McDonald’s, angry over broken ice cream machine
http://cbs12.com/news/local/man-pulls-gun-at-mcdonalds-angry-over-broken-ice-cream-machine

Florida man arrested for attacking McDonald’s employee over not getting a straw
https://www.abcactionnews.com/news/region-pinellas/florida-man-arrested-for-attacking-mcdonalds-employee-over-not-getting-a-straw-police-say

Florida Man Attacks World Champion kickboxer in parking lot
https://www.wptv.com/news/region-c-palm-beach-county/west-palm-beach/world-champion-kickboxer-fights-back-when-attacked-in-parking-lot-off-okeechobee-blvd

Florida Man has sex in bathroom, wrecks Xmas decorations
https://www.tcpalm.com/story/news/blogs/off-the-beat/2018/12/24/xmas-decoration-destroying-grinch-gets-groove-potty/2270908002/

Florida Men Regional Championship Brackets:
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1pf-MNs5sMZnWTUJqp4CVPTN81lA7UXl69fk6rFMGgAg/edit?usp=sharing

Continue reading E034 – Ice Cream Addict, Straw Man, Unlucky Mugger, and Bathroom Bangers

E033 – Burger John, McWeed, Alien Archer, and Cannibal


In Episode 33 of Florida Men: The Podcast, a Florida Man seeks alternate payment arrangements with a sex worker, another Florida Man seeks alternate payment arrangements at McDonald’s, a naked Florida Man hiding from aliens takes a bullet, and a Florida Cannibal breaks into his neighbor’s house and refuses to leave.

This week, we recorded extra content that can only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content!

News Sources:

Florida man offered to pay for oral sex from undercover officer with hamburger
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/florida/hamburger-hooker-287593

Florida man tries to trade pot for munchies at McDonald’s drive-thru
https://www.theledger.com/news/20181217/oops-florida-man-tries-to-trade-pot-for-munchies-at-mcdonalds-drive-thru

Naked Florida man armed with crossbow claimed aliens were after him
https://www.pnj.com/story/news/2018/12/12/naked-florida-man-crossbow-who-claimed-aliens-were-after-him-shot-deputy/2292792002/

Florida man breaks into neighbor’s home while his is on fire
https://www.cbs17.com/news/check-this-out/cannibal-corpse-guitarist-arrested-for-burglary-as-ammo-explodes-inside-his-burning-home/1654750287

Continue reading E033 – Burger John, McWeed, Alien Archer, and Cannibal

E032 – Three Grumpy Grinches, Two Pervy Santas, and a Snowbird in a Palm Tree


Merry Christmas! While we spend the day at the beach (that’s what the rest of the country does on Xmas day, right?) you can enjoy these Florida Man stories with some holiday cheer.

In Episode 32 of Florida Men: The Podcast, Santa’s helper gets a shiny new set of bracelets, A Florida grinch tries to swipe some decorations, Santa takes a trip to the drug store naked, and a couple of Florida kids who got coal in their stockings grow up to ruin it for the next generation. Recorded before a live audience at Caloosahatchee Jack’s in Fort Myers, Florida on December 9th, 2018.

This week, we included extra content that can usually only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content in the future!

News Sources:

Florida Man strolled through South Beach Walgreens wearing only a santa hat and boots
https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/article222338960.html

Florida Man caught on camera trying to steal Christmas inflatables
https://www.local10.com/news/florida/broward/man-caught-on-camera-trying-to-steal-christmas-inflatables-in-tamarac

Florida Man arrested trying to play Santa
https://www.actionnewsjax.com/news/trending-now/caught-redsuited-sex-offender-arrested-for-trying-to-play-santa-deputies-say/879978316

Florida Woman Forced to Take Down ‘Bah, humbug’ display
https://www.news-journalonline.com/news/20181204/woman-told-to-deep-six-holly-hill-bah-humbug-display

Florida man screams ‘Santa isn’t real’ at Christmas Festival
https://www.newsweek.com/video-florida-man-goes-christmas-festival-giant-sign-screams-santa-isnt-real-1244995

Florida woman, fighting to keep painting of Virgin Mary on mobile home
https://www.foxnews.com/us/florida-woman-85-fighting-property-management-to-keep-painting-of-virgin-mary-on-mobile-home

Continue reading E032 – Three Grumpy Grinches, Two Pervy Santas, and a Snowbird in a Palm Tree

E031 – Pippen, Pyro, Panties, and Plunderer


In Episode 31 of Florida Men: The Podcast, a Florida comedian takes a Bull by the horns, a Florida man’s website is the bomb, a Florida woman gives her UberEats customer something extra with his order, and a Florida man is the worst shoplifter ever.

This week, we recorded extra content that can only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content!

News Sources:

Florida Woman Sued by Scottie Pippen for Trashing a Rental Property
https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/community/broward/article222654670.html

Florida Man Stockpiled Nearly Four Tons of Explosives
https://www.bradenton.com/news/local/crime/article223016455.html

Florida Woman Gives Tourist ‘Disgusting’ Delivery After Ordering from UberEats
http://wutv29.com/news/offbeat/florida-man-says-he-received-dirty-underwear-in-uber-eats-delivery

Florida Man Arrested for Shoplifting After Job Interview at Kohl’s
https://www.mysuncoast.com/2018/12/08/florida-man-arrested-shoplifting-after-job-interview/

Continue reading E031 – Pippen, Pyro, Panties, and Plunderer

E030 – Vodka Thief, Stabby Farter, Mall Ninjas, and Plane Crash


In Episode 30 of Florida Men: The Podcast, a Florida man bogarts all the booze, a Florida woman pulls a knife on a man for fart-shaming her, a Florida man is attacked by mall ninjas, and a Florida woman is in a hit and run with a plane.

This week, we recorded extra content that can only be heard by our patrons. Go to http://patreon.com/FloridaMen to subscribe and get the exclusive patron-only content!

News Sources:

Florida man was upset that his buddy was chugging all his vodka. The situation escalated.
https://www.miamiherald.com/news/state/florida/article222330995.html

Florida woman pulls knife on man who confronted her about farting
https://www.wtol.com/2018/11/28/florida-woman-pulls-knife-man-who-confronted-her-about-farting/

Florida Man was slashed with sword on Thanksgiving by his wife and her boyfriend
https://www.wftv.com/news/local/wife-of-man-slashed-with-sword-on-thanksgiving-arrested-police-say/879348877

Florida woman charged with DUI after crashing into fence, hitting airplane
https://www.autoblog.com/2018/12/03/florida-woman-accused-of-hit-and-run-with-an-airplane/

Continue reading E030 – Vodka Thief, Stabby Farter, Mall Ninjas, and Plane Crash